Friday, April 17, 2015
Kenya Revisited...
Welcome to my first 'An African Adventure' blog for quite some time...and it will probably be the last for a while too! After uploading all my photograph's to Facebook from my holiday in Kenya, I thought an update on here would accompany them nicely.
Unfortunately, my arrival was overshadowed by the horrific incident at Garissa University, and the consequences of this tragedy caused some of our plans to alter slightly. We had hoped to travel to Uganda, but with all the educational facilities being closely monitored with an additional security presence, as well as the onset of the very heavy rainny season, we felt it best to mainly remain in Nancy's home village, and limit our movements to local areas only.
I arrived via British Airways at Nairobi International Airport around 9.15pm local time on April 1st, and unlike last time I breezed through immigration and customs. The problem was my internal flight to Kisumu to be reunited with my love didn't leave until 6.15 am the following morning! Never mind, there were a few coffee bars open so I patiently passed the time until I could check in.
The internal flight with Fly540 was interesting to say the least! No screenings on any departures board, no tannoy announcements...just one final reassuring check with a stewardess that I was actually on the correct plane!
Once I arrived, I was greeted by Nancy at Kisumu Airport, who had been given a lift by her kind brother-in-law Andrew, and our great friend Kerry tagged along for good measure too. I was so buzzing to see her after almost a year that the fact that I hadn't slept for over 24 hours didn't register with me at all...that was to hit me later. We returned to Dunga village, and her parents compound where I saw for the first time our brand new house which has just been built over the previous few weeks. It wasn't completely finished, but it gave us some privacy and I loved our 'love shack'!
After reaquainting myself with Nancy (you know what I mean!), she then proceeded to give me a fashion show with all the clothes I had brought for her. Thankfully, they all fitted well and more importantly to me Nancy appreciated my taste in choosing her clothes.
In the afternoon we jumped on the back of a motorbike and headed into Kisumu with Kerry, where we enjoyed a few beers (Tusker!) and some food. On our way back the rains started so we just brought some provisions for our house warming party, as Nancy had invited loads of her friends around. Despite the weather we all enjoyed a great time, although as I earlier indicated I was totally shattered so I retired early to bed.
Over the next two weeks I caught up with the rest of Nancy's family including her beautiful daughter Jojo, and started to revisit old haunts from my last trip to the area, namely Hippopoint, Dunga Hill Camp, and Redgate. We enjoyed a great night at Hill Camp where I caught up with Nancy's good friend, also called Nancy, and many beers were consumed with much fun and laughter. I also met Nancy's good friend Johnny Anderpants (?) for the first time who is from the US, as well as countless others during my stay...they are all very good and decent people, and I feel extremely priviledged to have been made to feel so welcome.
We also ventured to some new bars which was amazing to experience, as well as meeting new friends. Joe's Bar was a regular nearby waterering hole where I was introduced to Belozzi lager, as well as some milk stout, but the best suprise was a bar in Nanga called Skyweb.
I made the mistake of stating that I was a decent pool player (back in the day!), so my friends were keen for me to try my luck against some local talent (see attached photo).
I was a little rusty at first but I took on allcomers and generally came out on top. This included a match-up against the bar owner Ken as well as numerous other challengers. In fact by the end of the evening I was proving to be quite a celebrity, as photographs were being repeatedly requested, and it was a bit overwhelming at times to be totally honest.
Other new places we visited included The Rooftop, Le Pearl, and Caro's (the latter two both sharing amazing views and sunsets over Lake Victoria).
Towards the end of my stay Nancy's dear friend Samora arrived from Nairobi so we met him in town and went clubbing which was good fun...even if Nancy left me exposed to the clutches of some local girls who wanted a piece of me! I kid you not, but as I said to the three of them...I am a one woman man!
The following morning, Nancy, Samora and I walked to Dunga Beach where they introduced me to a very special local brew which I can't remeber the name of, but what I do recall is that the best way to describe it was fermented porridge which was extremely potent!
As my stay drew to a close the inevitable sadness began to creep in on both sides, but we did have plenty of time to talk and plan for our future together...so watch this space. Nancy's parents gave me some lovely traditional native vases to bring home, which drew compliments when I took them through customs on my way home, and saying goodbye to everyone was very tough. At least I got to meet the new addition to the family in baby Fifi, and I was pleased to see that Nancy's niece Lucille hadn't forgotten me, and it was great to see the pride on her brothers face when he showed me his new business which had just opened.
The journey home wasn't the best, as the internal flight was redirected via Eldoret resulting in my connecting flight being delayed. This meant I arrived back in the UK at 6am on the day I was due to be back at work, so as you can imagine I was very tired and exhausted once I finally arrived at work at midday. So much so that I am still struggling as I write this blog...but never mind, all the trials and tribulations were worth it to spend some precious time with Nancy.
An amazing adventure was experienced once again, and we will be reunited again soon, someday, somehow. Always and forever Nanshu' and nakupenda mpenzi.
Steve Muskett
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
A Leap Of Faith...
"Finally appreciating the wonders of an iPhone: WhatsAPP & Skype in particular...thanks for reaching out Nanshu'...!"
These were my comments on a recent Facebook post, along with the additional comment,
"...it took a lot of courage & a leap of faith, but hope springs eternal..."
My last 'African Adventure' blog shared the sad news that my romance with Nancy had ended, but as some of you may be aware, this isn't necessarily the case after all.
How has this happened, you may well ask?
Well, as stated above, it took a lot of courage and a leap of faith on her part to reach out to me in the first place. A very close friend of mine who I've been looking out for in recent months, and offering my support to, shares an appropriate phrase with me regarding her own situation which concerns 'growing a set of balls'. I can now testify that Nancy has definitely grown a 'pair', and I will always admire her and respect her for that. She initially sent me a belated birthday wish, and things just escalated from there. With the introduction of modern technology finally into my life, communicating with her is proving so much more rewarding than previously, which certainly helps to give us a chance with conducting a long distance relationship. But we both know that there are problems which lie ahead...
Going back to my last blog, I always felt uncomfortable about not ending things 'face-to-face', as I like to think that I do possess a set of balls big enough and man enough to have done this. I also stated that I felt conflicted whilst acknowledging that as one door closes, maybe another door opens up. It's understandable to remain conflicted as there are so many mixed emotions and unanswered questions surrounding the future, and how we can make it work, as well as my existing life in the UK, both professionally and personally. There are always further complications to face, as my close friend will no doubt testify...but if it's meant to be, then it will work out. If not, then so be it, and at least we tried.
I just wanted to confirm to any doubters out there, that whilst feeling conflicted emotionally, I am still prepared to see where this relationship goes, despite the obvious obstacles which lie ahead.
I remain an optimist, whilst retaining a sense of realism, and I'll always wear my heart on my sleeve as a silly, old, hopeless romantic! Time will tell as it all plays out...we've just got to go with the flow and seize the day! Carpe Diem!
Finally, a big thanks to Nanshu' for breaking the silence; to Elona for always providing me her loving support; to Curph & Chappers for the beers and their advice; for Josie for putting a roof over my head...and to my similarly conflicted friend for all her laughter and tears!
Take care & stay safe.
Steve Muskett
Thursday, September 4, 2014
The Sad Goodbye
As the sun sets on my recent romance with Nancy & on my 'African Adventure' in general, I just thought I'd sign off with one final blog giving some of the reasons why things came to an end...
"It's always a struggle to let somebody go,
It's a natural desire to own your lover, I know
And you can screw a man down until he takes to drinking
He'll give you all of his money, but you still don't know what he's thinking..."
'Fantastic Place ~ (Steve Hogarth/Marillion)
Over the past month doubts had started to creep in from both sides. Ultimately, trust issues then arose...and if you start to question trust, especially in a long distance relationship, then you have major problems. I must stress that neither one of us is to blame, nor are any third parties involved...it's just a stark realisation that our long-term future was riddled with unanswerable questions. Even an old, hopeless romantic like me could see that once the passion had aligned itself with the practical logistics of it all, then something had to give or change.
I started researching potential careers & opportunities for myself in Kenya, but what's an old fart like me gonna do for a living in the primitive culture that I will be inhabiting? There ain't no pension offices in Dunga, and I can't really see myself raising goats...can you? I would need substantial funds behind me, which just isn't possible, and even if I could find the money then I couldn't use this for commercial purposes in my own name; this would mean signing everything over to Nancy, and again if there are now trust issues then this obviously wouldn't make any sense. And for me to obtain a residency visa isn't a walk-in-the-park either!
So after considering all of the above, I made the tough decision with a very heavy heart to call quits on our relationship, before either one of us gets seriously hurt. Better for this to happen now than to stumble on looking through rose-tinted glasses imagining walking off into the sunset together hand in hand...life just doesn't work out that way, does it?
I do still feel conflicted to a certain extent over this due to the recent sacrifices that I've made. I gave up my lovely batchelor pad to move into a flat share, in order to start saving for our future. But I guess, things happen for a reason...I'm just not quite sure what it is yet!
Against some people's advice and maybe their better judgement, I have been sending Nancy regular money to pay for her rent & her daughter's after school tuition fees...but this has now stopped & all lines of communication have now been blocked. A final 'dear John' letter is in the post to her, explaining everything in more detail than I've disclosed here for obvious personal reasons, and I just hope that in time she can forgive me, although in essence I haven't actually done anything wrong.
So unfortunately that's the end of my adventure.
My exciting Christmas holiday plans in Kenya won't come to fruition after all, but as one door closes, maybe another door opens up...?
I'd just like to sign off by saying a very big thank you to all of the following wonderful people:
To Mini gg, Elona, and Trace...for their amazing unconditional love & friendship.
To Chappers...for getting the beers in & allowing me to bend his ear for a change!
To Georgia...for putting up sitting next to me & for being my 'Cookie' partner in crime!
And to Jane, Lyndsay & Michelle from work...for their kind words of comfort & ongoing support.
Much love & thanks to you all.
Stay safe & take care,
Steve xx
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
A Spiritual Journey To Find A Home...Epilogue & Postscript
I first starting writing blogs over three years ago with my series entitled, 'A Spiritual Journey To Find A Home'. Quite a few different series then came and went, culminating in this latest installment of 'An African Adventure..'
'ASJTFAH' ended with my final blog 'Enlightenment' which was written in March 2011 (please see link attached below), where I appeared to accept that my journey would be an ongoing experience.
However, my latest 'African Adventure' series of blogs have brought my search for my spiritual home ever closer. In order to tie-up the original theme, I thought it would be a good idea to add two further 'chapters' to my original journey:
Epilogue (to 'A Spiritual Journey To Find A Home'), and...
Postscript To The Epilogue.
Basically, the epilogue briefly covers the three years between March 2011 and March 2014, and the postscript deals with my Kenyan trip in April 2014 and the beckoning future...
Please read on & enjoy...
Epilogue
"He's seen too much of life. and there's no going back...
But there's a fighter in his heart and his body's tough
The years have been unkind but kind enough..."
Since my final 'ASJTFAH' blog in March 2011, much time has passed, and many things have evolved. The stability that the IVA approval brought me, made it possible to start to plan ahead a little, as well as make some changes to my life.
But not everything was positive…
March 2011 was a tough month as a very close friend tragically informed me that she had developed terminal throat
cancer, and subsequently broke off our friendship. She couldn’t bear to allow me to see her
fading away, so rather reluctantly, I respected her wishes, and I later found
out that had she gently passed away in the comfort of her family, to finally be at
peace. I felt totally helpless so I decided to organise a charity event to
raise funds and awareness, so in April 2012 myself and three colleagues from
work embarked on walking the entire length of The South Downs Way in
aid of Cancer Research UK, and we raised more than £3,500 – a feat of
which I hope she would have been proud.
In August of that year I also achieved another
significant milestone…I was finally able to move into my own apartment once
again. I badly needed my own space after sharing homes with others since my
flat in Cheltenham, which I vacated at the end of 2008, so finding an
amazing batchelor pad in the quiet area of Summersdale, was just what the
doctor ordered!
The other major development occurred in 2013, when my
sustained performance on a big project at work brought me substantial
rewards…and I made plans to go travelling once again, but this time my intended
location was Kenya in East Africa! This was entirely due
to a chance meeting on-line with the lovely Nancy Tubah…we
started out as friends but our relationship quickly escalated into a full-blown
romance, and all that was left was for one of us to make the move! Once the
aforementioned rewards were confirmed, it was a case of booking my flight to Nairobi
as I was once again in search of my spiritual home. At the time of writing
this, it is March 2014 and I am eagerly awaiting my ‘African Adventure…’
Postscript to the Epilogue
It is now one month further on (April 2014) and I have
just returned from an amazing trip to Kenya. Everything that I hoped for
came true, and not only did I finally find my spiritual home, but I also found
the true love of a special woman who I wish to spend the rest of my life with.
As I’ve stated previously, ‘home is where the heart is’,
and I can honestly say that this is true. I feel so blessed that such a
wonderful girl has entered my life, and this whole African adventure has
completed my journey.
What needs to be decided now is how to proceed to make
our lives complete, as we are currently living over 4,200 miles apart. I will
definitely be returning this Christmas, and will remain in Dunga, alongside Lake
Victoria with Nancy and her beautiful daughter Jojo
to partake in the New Year celebrations too. Then I think 2015 will be taken up
with planning for our permanent future together, as once March 2016 arrives,
this signals the completion of my five year IVA commitments…and I will be debt
free once again!
To enable me to make all of this possible, I have also
given up my luxury batchelor pad in Summersdale, and I will be shortly moving back into the
flat share I previously resided in with Josie & Glen. This small
sacrifice is worth it, as it allows me the opportunity to save for our future,
as well as giving me a better quality of life in the coming months (once I confirm the funds are in place to book my Christmas flight to Kenya!). Although I feel my journey has reached its end, I know
that there is still much more to come…but at least I have the comforting
thought of knowing where I truly belong, and I feel so happy to have finally
found some peace within myself. This is all because of Nancy, so like I say…’home
is truly where the heart is…’
Asante Nanshu’!
If anyone is interested, there is a pdf version of all of my 'Spiritual Journey' blogs edited into one defining document, including the epilogue & postcript which nicely concludes my story. Please contact me via the e-mail address below and I will gladly forward it on:
Until next time (whenever that may be?), stay safe & take care.
If anyone is interested, there is a pdf version of all of my 'Spiritual Journey' blogs edited into one defining document, including the epilogue & postcript which nicely concludes my story. Please contact me via the e-mail address below and I will gladly forward it on:
stevemuskett@yahoo.com
Until next time (whenever that may be?), stay safe & take care.
Steve Muskett ~ April 2014
Monday, April 28, 2014
Five Fave's - A Photo Review
This blog is a slight departure from my usual postings, as this time it's a photo review of my five favourite photo's from my recent trip to Kenya.
There were many pictures taken, most of which have already been shared elsewhere, but I just wanted to highlight the following five photograph's, as they are all very personal to me with extra special significance...
1.
This was the first ever photo taken of Nancy & I together, so for this reason alone it will be always remain special to both of us. It was taken early in the morning by Nick, our taxi driver, in the apartment which we spent our first night together in Nairobi.
2.
This is a beautiful photo of Nancy's gorgeous daughter, Jojo.
I brought with me a gift for her, which included the 'Hello Kitty' T-shirt which Jojo is proudly wearing in this picture. She loved id so much and wore it for the next two days, even sleeping in it I do believe! She also took a shine to my sunglasses and to my flat cap...so much so in fact, that I actually left my cap for her to enjoy after I left!
3.
This spectacular sunset was taken at Hippopoint, where I spent a wonderful evening with Nancy and her friends. No further explanation is necessary...the photograph speaks for itself!
4.
Everywhere we went someone was strumming a guitar! Although Nancy doesn't actually play herself, this was a rare moment caught on film when she picked up an acoustic and started messing around wirh it. This was taken at Redgate, a beautiful place where we would relax and sometimes go swimming in the lake (Lake Victoria).
5.
This final photo is my personal favourite of Nancy & I together.
It is a 'selfie' taken by Nancy and finds us both naturally happy, and feeling so comfortable together.
Unless something dramatic occurs in the next few months, there won't be any further blogs until late summer...this is when I hope to book my next flight to Kenya, and when I'll start to build up my preparations for Christmas 2014 and New Year 2015, both of which I'll be spending with Nancy in Dunga!
So until next time, be safe & take care.
Steve Muskett
There were many pictures taken, most of which have already been shared elsewhere, but I just wanted to highlight the following five photograph's, as they are all very personal to me with extra special significance...
1.
This was the first ever photo taken of Nancy & I together, so for this reason alone it will be always remain special to both of us. It was taken early in the morning by Nick, our taxi driver, in the apartment which we spent our first night together in Nairobi.
2.
This is a beautiful photo of Nancy's gorgeous daughter, Jojo.
I brought with me a gift for her, which included the 'Hello Kitty' T-shirt which Jojo is proudly wearing in this picture. She loved id so much and wore it for the next two days, even sleeping in it I do believe! She also took a shine to my sunglasses and to my flat cap...so much so in fact, that I actually left my cap for her to enjoy after I left!
3.
This spectacular sunset was taken at Hippopoint, where I spent a wonderful evening with Nancy and her friends. No further explanation is necessary...the photograph speaks for itself!
4.
Everywhere we went someone was strumming a guitar! Although Nancy doesn't actually play herself, this was a rare moment caught on film when she picked up an acoustic and started messing around wirh it. This was taken at Redgate, a beautiful place where we would relax and sometimes go swimming in the lake (Lake Victoria).
5.
This final photo is my personal favourite of Nancy & I together.
It is a 'selfie' taken by Nancy and finds us both naturally happy, and feeling so comfortable together.
Unless something dramatic occurs in the next few months, there won't be any further blogs until late summer...this is when I hope to book my next flight to Kenya, and when I'll start to build up my preparations for Christmas 2014 and New Year 2015, both of which I'll be spending with Nancy in Dunga!
So until next time, be safe & take care.
Steve Muskett
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